Haha! This is really very funny... Reminds me of the old school days

Element : WOMEN
Symbol : WO+
Atomic mass : Accepted as 53.6 Kg; isotopes
may vary from 40-200 kg.

Occurrence : Copious quantities in all urban
areas.

PHYSICAL PROPERTIES
1. Boils at room temperature
2. Freezes without any known reason.
3. Melts if given special treatment.
4. Bitter, if incorrectly used.
5. Sweet as Honey if given a proper
treatment.


CHEMICAL PROPERTIES

1. Have great affinity for Gold, Silver and a
range of precious stones and absorbs great
quantities of expensive substances.
2. May explode spontaneously without prior
warning and for unknown cause
3. Insoluble in liquids, but activity greatly
increases by that.
4. Most powerful money reducing agent
known to man.

TESTS
1. Pure specimen turns rosy pink when
happy.
2. Turns green when placed behind a better
specimen.

POTENTIAL HAZARD
illegal to possess more than one, although
several can be maintained at different
locations as long as specimens do not come
in direct contact with each other.

!! WARNING !!

PROLONGED EXPOSURE TO THIS
ELEMENT CAN CAUSE SEVERE FINANCIAL
HEMORRHAGING AND MENTAL DISTRESS.
BE CAUTIOUS!